I’m a dynamic, engaging, attractive woman. I’m creative, curious and funny. Oh yeah, and modest too!

I have my own successful one-woman communications consultancy (or at least it was successful until the recession hit!), and I know how to make small talk at business lunches and cocktail parties.

There once was a little girl who had a bad temper.  Her mother gave her a bag of nails, and told her that every time she lost her temper, she must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the girl had driven 37 nails into the fence.

Over the next few weeks, as she learned to control her anger, the number of nails she hammered into the fence each day gradually dwindled.

She discovered it was easier to hold her temper than it was to drive the nails into the fence.

Finally, the day came when the girl didn't lose her temper at all, and she went to find her mother...

A little boy asks his mother: “Why do you cry?”

“Because I'm a woman” she answers.

“I don’t understand” he says.

His mother hugs him and says: “And maybe you never will”

Later the little boy asked his father: “Why does mommy cry?”